Adulting 101: How to Recover from a Burn Out.

Around this time last year I experienced a major burn out.

A Burn Out is defined as : A Feeling of physical and emotional exhaustion, due to stress from working with people under difficult or demanding conditions. Burn out is followed by signs such as chronic fatigue, quickness to anger and suspicion, and susceptibility to colds, headaches, and fevers.

The only symptom I didn't have was the headaches.

I was doing everything I was meant to be doing but I was always tired.

Daudi, one of my fathers noticed and asked what's up Cici.

I explained how my months were running into each other and how my weeks were running into each other and how I was out of breath most of the time.

He said maybe there is something sucking your energy and we sat and we wrote down everything I did on a seven days week.

'No wonder you are tired,' said he.
'I'm always tired.' Said I
'When did you last watch a movie?'
I couldn't remember the last time I had watched a movie.

My days were packed with running this direction to work and running that direction for more work and coming home to do a bit of washing before settling down infront of my laptop to get some work done before I slept.

As a web content manager, I of course need to spend time online but that time had become all the time.

I would be on Facebook responding to comments and on Twitter looking for tweets to retweet and on YouTube checking how many views the latest video was at.
Then I would be on my phone reassuring clients who had missed an appointment that they could still come in next week.(I was side hustling at a mobile clinic).

So Daudi said we needed to plan out a sample week I could stick to for a while then adjust as time went by.

We aligned all similar activities to fit into one day. And all activities in the same direction fit into similar days. I talked to my boss too about my monthly,weekly and daily job allocation.
I had blank spaces in my week where I could decide to watch a movie, paint my nails or chat.

I started to seriously make a list of things to do monthly, weekly,daily.
Contrarily to the assumption I had before, making lists doesn't make you an -over scheduled -ADH-Maniac.

It has the advantage of making you know what you really need to do, what can be postponed and what is urgent .
Urgent vs Important.
That's a theory I read somewhere but can't remember where.

Having lists and planning out my month doesn't mean I've got my life together better than the next person, but I am less rushed.


I take time to reflect on things.
I don't rush through things just to get them done (I now have three White items that are not off white..  )

I have changed the weekly schedule many times to suit my needs.

But the wonderful outcome is I am not the half crazed burned out  irritable human being I was at some point.
I have also come to appreciate the importance of sticking to a job until it's done.

Daudi said why do you go home, make some tea, chat, start to read, stop, cook, take a shower, study some more....

Or why do you start to work, get on Facebook, watch a video, start to write an email, get up to make tea.
 Finish that email!

Work will stretch to fit the time you allocate it.

There are days I write a 500 word article in under one hour.
There are days it takes me the whole day and part of the night to write a 500 word article.

We all need a little help.

Sometimes we think we know everything we need to know about life and the affairs of existence but it helps to have someone with more years and experience guide us along.

Tips
1. Make a to do List
2. Use mornings or late nights to organise the day
3. Learn to say -no I can't handle this right now-
4. Watch a movie/ read/ listen to music
5. Reduce the time you spend on tasks- learn to do them faster

How to cook food: An incomplete and shallow guide for cooking rice, flour, meat and vegetables among other basic meals

Lesson 4

omena fry

Omena's nutritional facts
Protein
Calcium
Vitamin D
Iron
Zinc

How to cook Omena
Wash them
Boil them for 5 minutes
Lift the out of the hot water
Dip them into cold water
Heat them on a pan to Dry them
Add oil and fry until crispy
Add onions and stir until the onion is brownish
Add Tomatoes
Stir until soft

Add a pinch of salt
Add hoho and stir
Throw in some dhania
It's ready to eat with your ugali
You can squeeze in lemon for taste.

I never considered omena a food item until I went to Malaysia and found out that Omena is a national dish, rather part of the national dish. In one month I had eaten enough omena meals to compensate for a whole adulthood of not eating the fish. They call it ikan bilis and nasi lemak, the national food has omena in the red paste, and on its own. You also eat omena in kampong fried rice and as a snack you can buy in the supermarket to eat in the bus on your way home.

their nasi lemak

our omena with ugali

their omena 

Our omena


I googled the three beautiful pictures, asanteni sana.

This Chic: Do You Have The Nerve?

If I ever get the nerve to say hello in this cafe

Say you will

Say you will

I got picked up today

Not at the bar, but on the road on a bright mid Sunday morning.

He said

I am Kevin and I like how you look

I said thank you

I like your figure He said, to be specific

I said okay

He said you know your father and mother met the same way you and me have met, let's make history where are you going can I come with you?

All in one breath

I considered it for three seconds

I could let myself get picked up

And become Wakefini

And nine months later I will be waBrayo for the rest of my life because he will insist we name our child after his cousin  in America.

I said, I am one of Jehovah's Witnesses. Do you know any deaf people around here?

He said oh right JehovahWitness

He said there was a deaf around the corner.

Kwa club Ile iko pale Shell

She works there? I asked.

He explained some more.

I asked if he wanted something to read.

 He said if you give me a book I'll read. I gave him an Awake! 

And he left.

Nerve

My  Samsung dictionary has nine entries for -nerve- 

No. 4 Nerve- is the courage that you need to do something difficult or dangerous.

That's close enough.

Is that all that is needed? I mean was Kevin courageous and was it dangerous to run a pick up line on a total stranger on a Sunday morning?

I don't think so. Here you are blaming culture and this being a man's world but It's probably he's just not that into you.

But maybe some suffer from nerves

No.3 Nerves

Feelings of anxiety or tension.

But reflexology cures that and I know just the person to give you the fix. Just inbox.

"Mr.Bennet! Have mercy on my poor nerves!"

No. 6 Nerve-disapproval - when you do something which you have no right to do. 

As a member of the female species even in a world that grows chicken in one month, you are not supposed to have the nerve to use a pick up line.

So keep your nerve girl

No.7 Nerve- The ability to remain calm and determined in a difficult situation.

Until the right Kefini picks you up and literally carrys you home.

More