My friend Mary, she is the only one that calls me Sesilia. And she is right, I have never understood why I'm called Sissilia when there is a letter e as clear as a rain drop right there.
When Mary was coming up with her marriage vows, she had to include a Sesilia allegiance clause for her husband. It went like this.
'I, Gilbert take thee Mary as my wife, and also take Sesilia your single friend as my first born daughter/ small sister or whatever it is she is, we shall figure it as we go along but I promise she is always welcome in our home.'
And they have stayed true to that promise. Mary and Gilbert's house is my second home. I know if I called at 10 pm and said 'I'm coming', they would both get out of bed and come to wait for me at the bus stop.
Mary has a couch. And a flowered pillow. They are mine. That is the couch I go and stretch out when the world is dark and scary and I am let alone to only lift my head to drink tea, or acknowledge the entrance of another family member.
It's on this couch that I have told some confused feelings and received some straight up telling off.
Mary will stop rolling the chapati and point at me with the Rollin pin.
'SESILIA, you think a privilege makes a man? Eh? You think a good man is defined by his station? Ebu remove that from your brain. A privilege can be stripped off in a day '
Or that time I had this man at work trying to buy me a lot of good coffee.
And I told her he is really a good man.
Mary, pointing at me with that Rolling pin again said.
'How can you even think about it! I know being single can be hard but that one thing he is missing is the most important thing!'
Mary is one of those friends who picked me out of the crowd and pulled me to her side.
She has always put me by her side.
I appreciate her for how whenever I go to her house, it's like nothing else is important. I am the important focus for the day even when her husband comes, tired from work.
He will just go and sort his bath water and food and if there is no food he will cook it and feed the daughter and will not try to interrupt our discussions with his wife.
When my married friends go into the kitchen and leave me in the sitting room with the husband I want to pull my hair out because - me I didn't come to visit this dude- unless it's Moose or Allan 😅 those I can just pick up a book and ignore them.
When I am about to leave he will call Mary and give her some money and tell her to pack some shopping from their shop.
'Gilbert said I give you this for busfare.'
She will say and if I resist she will say.
'Us we are two, you you are alone, ebu take it.'
Mary bought me that skirt, she said it would be perfect coz I'm taller.
Another friend bought me the top. They go well together.
He said, as we were walking along a street with some vendors.
'Ciss, wait,' Then he asked the vendor to bring down the top.
I was telling him some tale so I didn't realise he was getting it for me.
'Put this on,
Perfect,
How much?'
He paid and we continued walking.
I told him I felt like a cartoon character, the sharp collar. He asked which cartoon? I said the one with a blue evil guy with a hood sense of style. I meant Mega Mind. When I got home and looked in the mirror it was a perfect fit.
I love people who buy me clothes. Saves me a lot of trouble please continue.
So Mary is one of my favourite people.
Her family is my family.
When I texted her that my mother had died she came within an hour.
Then her husband called.
And their tiny daughter Hope asked to speak to me.
'Cecilia Poole,, ' she said.
Mary has a very developed sense of humour. I think she is then one person who can keep me laughing for a whole afternoon. You wouldn't think it looking at her sitting submissively between her husband and child on a Sunday, but you know that quote that says humour is not derived out of joy but of sorrow?
She is able to describe bleak situations in such a funny way you feel bad but you are laughing so you laugh and say pole at the same time.
That's the best way to approach hard times I think.
She also went through a series of frogs before meeting Gilbert and no matter how many times I hear the stories, which she will tell me as a warning, whenever I mention I might have met someone but I'm not sure, which is twice a year, they are still pretty hilarious and I just hope I never meet one of her former beaus because I will burst out laughing.
Her story about growing up in Ukambani then coming to try eke out a life in Nairobi is just as funny and should be recorded and read over and over on some evenings.
At this point I am wondering do I gravitate more to people who have had two or three life times squeezed into one?
I possibly do, theirs is much more to see.
Their daughter loves me more than I deserve. When Mary's love runs out, times when I have taken her for granted and she decides she can do without me as well. Hope will call me to ask when she can visit and give the parents no rest until a date is arranged.
She is such a cool kid. She can dance some moves I am yet to understand which part of the body has a joint which can twist in that manner.
They named her Clean Hope.
Not uncertain Hope.
This is the real deal.
I think the reason I have been okay with not having kids of my own especially at this crucial age is because of the ones I am allowed to have access to as an aunt. Hope, Amani, Nevin, Sophia. Nevin is a kid in my flat, he calls me mama Happy and because of him the other kids now want to rush into my house when I come in and a mother will be like.
'Acha kusumbua auntie! '
And the kid will be like ' si ni rafiki yangu.' As she continues to remove her shoes so she can run in to jump up and down on my bed.
I guess it amuses them that my kitchen and by living room and bedroom are all and the same thing. It's an adventure.
That is the story of Mary. We met in 2007, I hope to try and be a worthwhile friend in the days to come.
When Mary was coming up with her marriage vows, she had to include a Sesilia allegiance clause for her husband. It went like this.
'I, Gilbert take thee Mary as my wife, and also take Sesilia your single friend as my first born daughter/ small sister or whatever it is she is, we shall figure it as we go along but I promise she is always welcome in our home.'
And they have stayed true to that promise. Mary and Gilbert's house is my second home. I know if I called at 10 pm and said 'I'm coming', they would both get out of bed and come to wait for me at the bus stop.
Mary has a couch. And a flowered pillow. They are mine. That is the couch I go and stretch out when the world is dark and scary and I am let alone to only lift my head to drink tea, or acknowledge the entrance of another family member.
It's on this couch that I have told some confused feelings and received some straight up telling off.
Mary will stop rolling the chapati and point at me with the Rollin pin.
'SESILIA, you think a privilege makes a man? Eh? You think a good man is defined by his station? Ebu remove that from your brain. A privilege can be stripped off in a day '
Or that time I had this man at work trying to buy me a lot of good coffee.
And I told her he is really a good man.
Mary, pointing at me with that Rolling pin again said.
'How can you even think about it! I know being single can be hard but that one thing he is missing is the most important thing!'
Mary is one of those friends who picked me out of the crowd and pulled me to her side.
She has always put me by her side.
I appreciate her for how whenever I go to her house, it's like nothing else is important. I am the important focus for the day even when her husband comes, tired from work.
He will just go and sort his bath water and food and if there is no food he will cook it and feed the daughter and will not try to interrupt our discussions with his wife.
When my married friends go into the kitchen and leave me in the sitting room with the husband I want to pull my hair out because - me I didn't come to visit this dude- unless it's Moose or Allan 😅 those I can just pick up a book and ignore them.
When I am about to leave he will call Mary and give her some money and tell her to pack some shopping from their shop.
'Gilbert said I give you this for busfare.'
She will say and if I resist she will say.
'Us we are two, you you are alone, ebu take it.'
Mary bought me that skirt, she said it would be perfect coz I'm taller.
Another friend bought me the top. They go well together.
He said, as we were walking along a street with some vendors.
'Ciss, wait,' Then he asked the vendor to bring down the top.
I was telling him some tale so I didn't realise he was getting it for me.
'Put this on,
Perfect,
How much?'
He paid and we continued walking.
I told him I felt like a cartoon character, the sharp collar. He asked which cartoon? I said the one with a blue evil guy with a hood sense of style. I meant Mega Mind. When I got home and looked in the mirror it was a perfect fit.
I love people who buy me clothes. Saves me a lot of trouble please continue.
So Mary is one of my favourite people.
Her family is my family.
When I texted her that my mother had died she came within an hour.
Then her husband called.
And their tiny daughter Hope asked to speak to me.
'Cecilia Poole,, ' she said.
Mary has a very developed sense of humour. I think she is then one person who can keep me laughing for a whole afternoon. You wouldn't think it looking at her sitting submissively between her husband and child on a Sunday, but you know that quote that says humour is not derived out of joy but of sorrow?
She is able to describe bleak situations in such a funny way you feel bad but you are laughing so you laugh and say pole at the same time.
That's the best way to approach hard times I think.
She also went through a series of frogs before meeting Gilbert and no matter how many times I hear the stories, which she will tell me as a warning, whenever I mention I might have met someone but I'm not sure, which is twice a year, they are still pretty hilarious and I just hope I never meet one of her former beaus because I will burst out laughing.
Her story about growing up in Ukambani then coming to try eke out a life in Nairobi is just as funny and should be recorded and read over and over on some evenings.
At this point I am wondering do I gravitate more to people who have had two or three life times squeezed into one?
I possibly do, theirs is much more to see.
Their daughter loves me more than I deserve. When Mary's love runs out, times when I have taken her for granted and she decides she can do without me as well. Hope will call me to ask when she can visit and give the parents no rest until a date is arranged.
She is such a cool kid. She can dance some moves I am yet to understand which part of the body has a joint which can twist in that manner.
They named her Clean Hope.
Not uncertain Hope.
This is the real deal.
I think the reason I have been okay with not having kids of my own especially at this crucial age is because of the ones I am allowed to have access to as an aunt. Hope, Amani, Nevin, Sophia. Nevin is a kid in my flat, he calls me mama Happy and because of him the other kids now want to rush into my house when I come in and a mother will be like.
'Acha kusumbua auntie! '
And the kid will be like ' si ni rafiki yangu.' As she continues to remove her shoes so she can run in to jump up and down on my bed.
I guess it amuses them that my kitchen and by living room and bedroom are all and the same thing. It's an adventure.
That is the story of Mary. We met in 2007, I hope to try and be a worthwhile friend in the days to come.
No comments:
Post a Comment