THIS CHIC

Every month a new article is born.

Some articles take years to write, some take days

Some take a few minutes.

Sometimes when an idea is so strong and wants to get out

I get up in the middle of the night and start scribbling.

Some of these will never see the light of day

I write them for me.

Some articles fill me with fear

What will the audience think?

What if they take it as a representation of my true self

As it truly is;

What if they start to view me as:

THIS CHIC.

Two of my close friends call me- this chic-

Perhaps they are still trying to understand why I do things the way I do

Perhaps they are surprised each time I say something that should have remained in the brain

I have a new monthly called -THIS CHIC-

It might raise controversy. I am very very scared of it.

But, if I don’t publish it, I will never rest.

It has nothing to do with me

It has everything to do with the women folk I interact with everyday.

Don’t shoot the messenger please please.

It has taken me exactly  two years to publish- The fatherless race-

I am no longer scared of it now

It still needs a lot of work though.

But I am a determined chic

Like only thin people know how.

Online Writing Tips for freelance writers

The question I got recently was- I only write fiction, can I apply for online writing jobs? And an accompanying article that got me so intrigued I suggested the writer send it to Magunga.com.

 So can you write about other topics if you only have experience in one topic?

The writing police will tell you to focus on one form of writing, so that you can become better and eventually become an expert. True;that works for  print media, where they require you to write on a specific topic every month and your cheque matures on the 10^th of the next month just like that.

For five years I wrote about ICT and Agriculture for Business and Finance magazines. It involved visiting farms, Agricultural shows, Veterinaries, Productin Units. Places I didn’t mind very much. Farmers are generous. One farmer gave us a basket of broccoli, beet root and spinach. Another let us pick mushrooms from his farm.

That is print media. The work is alright, the pay is alright but it can get repetitive if that’s all you are doing. You need to changamka a bit and mix in a little online writing.

What do you need to become an online writer?

Two things: 

•   Love the internet
•   Have an imagination.

Writing is just about arranging words to fit into the desired outcome. Remember, words are like fabric in a tailor’s hands. The fabric can become anything when handled right. Handle words right and you will come up with anything.

handle words like fabric

 

What I do:

Say you are only good at writing health articles, then out of the big blue sky you are asked to write five articles about condominiums in the Bahamas.

I arrange my research into three parts, by thinking of titles I can work with. This is where my imagination comes in. I come up with titles like;

•   Why you should get a Condominium that doesn’t offer lift service in the Bahamas.
•  Two bedroom Condominiums available for small families!
• Will moving to a Condominium in the Bahamas improve my physical health?

I then search my keywords around these. The last two articles will be easy to write, you just need titles like;

• Consider Bahamas Condominiums for your retirement
• Beach Condominiums in Bahamas, 2016.

  So you see you can still throw in something about health in all the above titles.

(pictures all google imaged)

Socializing the introvert- 5 reasons we are avoiding you and no, we don’t hate you.

Did you just have two Red-bulls?

No? Well, why are you screaming, cheering, jumping, spinning?

 I cannot understand what you’re saying. You are an explosive, and we are afraid if you ask us to go bungee jumping we might just say yes.

 If we are avoiding you it doesn’t mean we hate you, or we got another bff. It just means we cannot handle that amount of energy right now. 

Baga Baga

Baga Baga (fager fager) is  kikuyu word for restlessness it means, you are too busy. I feel like I am staring at prints and stripes and lots of sunshine and I feel confused.

We like calm, but you keep getting up every few minutes. You are unnerving us. We feel like we need to step out to give your ADH some space.

You are asking questions

Gathoni, are you okay?

 Gathoni, are you bored?

 Gathoni, are you feeling alright?

Are you sure you are not bored?  Shall we leave?

Gathoni, say something.

I am okay, I am not bored, I already said I like the party, I am having fun sitting here, saying nothing. Okay?

You have info and you want info.

 We like to listen to stories, but not stories about other people’s domestic arrangements. That is worse than watching Mexican soaps. We don’t want to know who bought a big house but is now broke.

You are surprised we didn’t hear Kim broke up with Monica?

 Tell us about the strange shoe maker who makes fancy clocks out of old shoes. That, we wanna  know.

You like to twist our hand

We introverts can be very very free, easy, laid back  and all that. But if we discover you have  found a way to make us do things we haven’t thought about, planned for and turned it around the head for the last three months, we will keep off. Whether it is something good or bad. We move at our own pace.

It’s true, I like that dress, it’s only 200 bob, it would look good on me. But I am not gonna buy it. Not today, and don’t even try to buy it for me, I’ll never wear it, unless you are a female relative, then I don’t have much choice.

New: The fatherless race and the animals we fear the most- The Elephants.

The white Elephant

This is  when things don’t get talked about and you all act like it’s not there. But the thing with an elephant is that it’s too huge and it cannot be ignored. The more you ignore it, the bigger it grows and it starts to shed toxic mold. My white elephant almost squished me In my last year of high school. It was my last year at home. I didn’t want to leave home. I wanted to prolong my time and clung to the last bits and hoped it wouldn’t happen. Now that I have learnt that talking about the white elephant scares it; I know I should have sat my grandma down and told her, “I am not going to the city, I want to stay here and cook and clean for you and look after the animals.” But I was too scared of the adults.

The Money Elephant

The money elephant is a sibling to the white elephant. Mine used to be the- who will give the child the money elephant- Because you are everybody’s child but no one’s in particular.

The Sunday before going back to school would be my worst, when my mother didn’t give me cash because she assumed my grandma gave me some, and my grandma didn’t give me because she assumed uncle gave me some. In the end it would be my uncle’s wife giving me money for pads and underwear, and me learning not to ask for money, ever.

 The money elephant drags me down even now, I still don’t ask for money, even when it is owed. This results in me doing a lot of charity work, or getting cheques three months later. It doesn’t help that I am a creative, and I recently discovered I have the creatives’ curse. That thing that makes you charge Ksh 500 for a job worth Ksh 5, 000, and you still wonder why you cannot afford that trip to Maldives.

The Warped Personality Elephant.

This elephant differs from one illegitimate to the other. It could be Low self esteem, bitterness, Perfectionism, Anger. I have been boxed by each one of these. But with time I am finding ways to get out from beneath the elephant’s foot. When my self esteem hit rock bottom, at 12 I found a way to deal with it . Not the best way but it helped me manage adolescence. If someone asked -why don’t you have a father- I had a ready cutting sarcastic answer that ensured they never asked me anything else; ever, even what time it was. 

Self esteem comes and goes, but I have learnt how to work around it. I do things I am good at, I hang out with people I like, and I help people. 

per·fec·tion·ism

pərˈfekSHəˌnizəm

noun

noun: perfectionism

refusal to accept any standard short of perfection.

My perfectionilism/perfect mode/perfectionism Elephant dissolved exactly one year ago, September 2015. I will tell you about it sometime. It is called the rotten orange story. It is in my notebook somewhere.

The Trust No one Elephant.

 

We  learn to trust no-body early. I guess it is from the idea that they will just up and go and leave you.  I would never admit I have trust issues, but a close observation at the kind of relationships I keep is telling. I used to be a very private person, my life I lived in the pages of my diary. I sorted my issues by myself. I broke friendships very quickly when trust was broken. I was self reliant, and even trusting in God was a problem at sometime. I always needed a backup plan.

 We, of the fatherless race have a shield all around us, it’s like a motto- before you hurt me, I will be so far away. If you gain our trust, then you are a superhuman. I have friendships spurning 18 years. Mostly people who know that if I am telling them something, they better guard it with their lives.

Thanks google for pics.